Tuesday, June 24, 2008

How Stupid Can You Actually Be?

Combined IQ = today's temperature in Fahrenheit.
As if Hulk Hogan's family hasn't suffered enough disgrace recently, his wife Linda lowered the bar even further in a 911 call to the police. She called police when she saw a suspected stalker parked in front of her house.
Now, the management of this website has no idea, no idea at all, how a person can actually be this stupid and moronic, but we actually have a link to a recording of the 911 call, which proves that this is all very real.
Linda: Now he's driving away. He's been ordered away because he's threatened my life before and I don't want him around. I'm shaking, I'm trembling. I'm following him until he leaves.
911: Okay, you said he left, or he is leaving?
Linda: Yeah he left, I'm following him right now.
911: Why are you following him?
Linda: I don’t know.
911: Stop following him!
After placing that 911 call, Linda Hogan spent her afternoon finger-painting and discussing how pretty horsies are. Then she tried to eat a rock.

G'day mate.

Our next news story comes from (big surprise!) Australia:

Australian man charged with driving wheelchair while drunk
SYDNEY (AFP) — An Australian man has been charged with driving his motorised wheelchair down a highway while drunk, police said Monday.
Motorists were forced to drive around the 64-year-old man after he fell asleep in an exit lane on the Captain Cook Highway in northern Queensland state at 10am on Friday.
When a passing police patrol woke him up he told them he had intended to drive 14 kilometres (nearly nine miles) to visit a friend.
He was given a breathalyser test and found to be more than six times over the legal limit for driving, police say.
"The vehicles that we normally hear about with drink-driving are the family car, the truck, the motorbike," Inspector Bob Waters told reporters.
"But there are also other classes of vehicles that are subject to drink-driving laws.
"People should be aware that drink-driving laws cover these kinds of vehicles, but also others like horses and bicycles.
The man was ordered to appear in court on July 7.

Don't you remember the first time you drank 17 beers and then decided to drive your wheelchair for ten miles down the highway to see your friend? Man, those were good times. All the decisions we made were so rational and sane. We were the next generation, the torch-bearers leading humanity into the 21st century.


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