Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Even More Reasons to Hate Australia

Please God make it stop!

So, just when we thought we were out of reasons to hate Australians, this story came through on the wire.

If we understand it correctly, here is pretty much what happened: Some Australian jackass and his drug-addict girlfriend decide to rob a restaurant. They escape with what they think is a bag of cash, but ends up being a bag of bread. They get caught by the cops, but just before they do, the idiot Australian decides to shoot his girlfriend in the hip for good measure!

Seriously, wtf?! How stupid can you Australians be? Were they blindfolded when they robbed this place? Maybe, as a challenge, they did one of those three-legged-race robberies, when they both put on the same pair of pants.

When God created the world, he took a big fat crap on Australia. What an awful place.

Here is the full story:

MELBOURNE, Australia - Two Australian robbers were sentenced Tuesday for their April Fools Day heist at the Cuckoo Restaurant, where they thought they were hauling away a big sack of cash that turned out to be bread rolls.

Benjamin Jorgensen, 38, and his accomplice Donna Hayes, 36, were sentenced in Victorian County Court after pleading guilty to robbing the restaurant in the southern Australian city of Melbourne on April 1 last year.

During the holdup, Jorgensen grabbed what he believed was a bag with the Cuckoo's cash earnings of about $26,000, but later found it was full of bread rolls, the court heard.

He also fired his gun accidentally in the caper, shooting Hayes in the buttocks.

Judge Roland Williams told the robbers they were a "pair of fools," before sentencing Hayes to eight years in prison and Jorgensen to seven.

Earlier this week, defense lawyer Greg Thomas said Jorgensen had been under the influence of drugs at the time, had made a full admission to police and was remorseful, News Ltd. newspapers reported.


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