Thursday, March 22, 2007

The Deer Hunter

That's a fine looking beast...

A 20 year old man was sentenced to probation after he was found guilty of "having sexual contact with a dead deer." As disturbing as this may sound, this is not the first conviction of this type for Brian Hathaway of Duluth, MN. Quoting the article:
He was found guilty in April 2005 of felony mistreatment of an animal after he killed a horse with the intention of having sex with it. He was sentenced to 18 months in jail and two years of extended supervision on that charge as well as six years of probation for taking and driving a vehicle without the owner's consent.

That is some sick, twisted shit. The judge said it best: "This type of behavior is disturbing. It's disturbing to the public. It's disturbing to the court." Of course, when we read this story, one thing came to mind: "Raving psycho! Butchered 400 chickens and screwed a beagle. I'm taking him back to Nevada where he's wanted for banging horses!"
Now, we here at HPO strongly believe that Minnesotans are kind-hearted, God-fearing people, who live happily with their purple football team and their funny accents. We happen to be big fans of Minnesota, and every time we travel to their great Northern state, we are treated with dignity and respect. Sadly, every once in a while, the peace is shattered by perverts who wanna rape deer or turn fish houses into Hawaiian salt factories.

At this time, we'd like to introduce you to the fine Bolivian tradition known as tinku. Tinku is an ancient ritual still practiced today in the hills of Bolivia, and this is how it was described in The New York Times:

Tinku, in Bolivia's high plains, pits two tribes in Sacaca each February in day-long drinking and all-out fist-fighting. Despite the bloodshed, Tinku survives, helped by President Evo Morales' support for indigenous cultures. The mayor of Sacaca called Tinku "a sublime, beautiful act," in a February New York Times dispatch.

That's right, an all-day, alcohol-fueled bloodbath that is open to all ages. Women and children are invited! Bring Grandma and Grandpa out for an traditional day of sunshine, fresh air, and skull fractures!

From the tinku article in wikipedia:

The tinkus can become very violent, and people do get injured and even die. But, the deaths can be seen as good omens for good harvests. Because of the violence, police attend tinkus in some places to prevent bloodshed. In other places, tinkus are banned by the government or church because they had become too violent in the past.

Grandes cojones.

Evo Morales, being the traditionalist that he is, fully supports these tinkus. And why wouldn't he? After all, they use traditional Inca weapons, such as slingshots, clubs, whips, and "sometimes horses." Being patriotic is a good thing...

Anyways, for those of you that are interested, Photo-Mundo has a pretty extensive photo gallery of what goes down at your standard tinku. We highly recommend checking it out.


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