Tuesday, November 21, 2006


Welcome to the Wiener Patrol.
It's very hard to determine which is more frustrating: Watching Drew Bledsoe consistently overthrow wide-open receivers after having seven seconds to make up his mind in a pocket the size of a suite at the Ritz, or watching Tony Romo dance around the field like a ballerina, putting bullet spirals right between the numbers while throwing across his body on the run. Anyways, after losing the Big Tuna's trust and his starting job along with it, Drew has recently let his true feelings be known by starting his own blog, TonyHomo.com. In his writings, Drew confesses his love for hamburgers and his hate for the man he only refers to as "Homo". Quality stuff.

Buy a couple more palaces, you greedy bastards.

The Saudi Arabian royal family, who have been well-known for being keen to undertake in some rather scandalous finanacial ventures in the past, are causing a commotion again.

The British government's Serious Fraud Office is requesting access into the bank account information of two men believed to have been acting as middlemen in hundred-million dollar illegal weapons trades between the British war machine manufacturer BAE and the House of Saud. These two men have been described as "a prominent Lebanese politician" and "a wealthy Syrian."

Not under-the-table enough for you yet?

Additionally, documents that were accidentally leaked proved that BAE inflates the prices of its military contracts, sometimes by as much as 32%, in order to fund the luxurious lifestyles of Saudi Arabia's many princes. Now, in response to the British government's probes on this shady activity, Saudi Arabia is threatening to sever all diplomatic ties between itself and the United Kingdom.

Saudi Arabia, we call your bluff.

There is no way on God's green earth that Saudi Arabia would sever ties with Britain. Britain has long been providing the Saudi Arabian royal family with priceless intelligence about the tyrannical Shia muslim regime right next door in Tehran. You think that Dr. Ahmadinejad wouldn't jump at the chance to assassinate a few members of the pro-western, oil-rich House of Saud (who are all Sunni muslims)? Or what about al-Qaida? They hate the Saudis for their pro-American relations and their liberal politics with regards to the Islamic faith. They would love a slice of that oil pie too...

There is simply too much for Saudi Arabia to lose by cutting off ties with England. No way will it happen. No way in hell.


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