Hoobabakanda

Something's cookin' in Heaven's Kitchen.

If you were to look up "Washed-up two-bit hustler" in the dictionary, you would probably find a picture of Robert Tilton. To sum up his career properly, one would have to use words such as "played-out player", "degenerate", "full of shit", and possibly "camelfucker."

"Reverend" Tilton has made a fortune by using religious infomercials as marketing vehicles for scamming monetary "donations" from his mainly African-American audience. He quickly dropped off the radar after a scandal involving an investigation revealed that his religious organization was a front for an extortion operation.

On his official website, Tilton asks "for your financial support of this ministry," and says "God bless you for being obedient!" The webpage claims to be available in eight languages, but there's so many grammatical errors in the English version that we here at HPO wonder if the other versions are legible at all.

Anyways, the "financial support of this ministry", according to Tilton, means spending it on such lavish luxuries as 38-foot fishing boats, Jaguar automobiles, a "satellite dish the size of a sharecropper's shack", 50-ft yachts, and waterfront vacation homes. At one point, his scam was pulling in $800,00 a month.

This, however, takes the cake: He spent two months fishing and watching TV in Hawaii, and called it "his own self-described version of Jesus' forty days in the wilderness", according to the Dallas Observer.

But, surprisingly enough, that's not even the point. The point is that some guys created the following videos of Tilton:

Look out. There's four more videos.